I'm not sure that I know how to write what I am thinking about and feeling anymore. Whenever I sit down to write about anything that is not sharing about the farm or some neat thing that I have seen, which is most of the time, I mostly end up doing a whole lot of backspacing and rarely end up saving any material at all. Like I said, this isn't because I am not thinking or wanting to say things...FAR from it. It's because I just don't know what to say.
Everywhere I turn I see fake order or outright chaos.
Our leaders talk about democracy while protecting the very oligarchical interests which rise up again and again to enslave us. We thought inventing a middle class would solve the problem, allowing the lower class to work their way into the middle class and maaaaybe all the way to the upper class. But all we did was solidify a class structure that must continue to fight itself because it is inherently out of balance.
I feel pity for many of my fellow Canadians who have let themselves buy into this system in order to try to avoid being part of the abhorrent lower class. It is hard to turn the fury I feel, into pity. Fury at how much acceptance there is for the truly Fascist actions of police in Toronto at the G20 conference over the weekend. Fury at the betrayal of our leaders and the weakness in my fellow citizens, who do not recognize the cages slowly but surely being erected around us. Fury that in so many ways, our selfishness and closed mindedness makes us deserve those cages. But does fury get us anywhere? Will pity or forgiveness really get us further?
I guess it should be no surprise that I think both fury and pity must be used, in balance. I see little point in just laying down and giving up what I believe is so valuable...my life and my soul.
So I guess I am able to maintain focus on one line of thinking for a short period of time, but then something else pops up, like the outright chaos that is the havoc caused by our addiction to oil. This is highlighted lately by the mess in the Gulf of Mexico but addiction to oil has wreaked havoc all over the world, all the while remaining fundamentally necessary to maintaining the explosion in numbers of humans over the past 200 years. While I feel for the plight of those around the Gulf of Mexico, it is maddening to see the rage over this disaster, while there remains a near total ignorance of 50 years worth of similar environmental destruction in Nigeria where broken pipelines have been allowed to run for months without repair at times. How many Americans are aware of the damage and suffering that has been caused in and to this region, in order to supply 25% of US oil imports?
And how many Canadians are more than willing to accept similar destruction now, in our own country? The tarsands exploitation is spreading rapidly into Saskatchewan, where the economic benefits are readily accepted just as they were and are here in Alberta. Yet we all know that this is basically open pit mining on a scale larger than anything seen before now and the result is mile after mile of ponds full of toxic tailings and at least near total water depletion or contamination. We hem and we haw and we say the government should deal with it all the while we continue most all of the practices which REQUIRE the continuation of that exploitation. And this is so for most any issue.
It would be funny if it wasn't all so fucking frustrating...and so very dangerous.
So I guess I do still have some things to say but you can see why I don't get a lot of posts out these days. This bit of rambling took over an hour to get out.
3 months ago